“You are not a beautiful and unique snowflake.” ~ Chuck Palahniuk

 Well, you are beautiful and unique, but…

Ever have one of those days where things keep knocking you down, and you end up feeling a little squashed and unimportant. And then you decide the best course of action is to greet all of your friends with choruses of “Validate me! Validate me! Tell me you love me! Tell me I’m wonderful!”

I had that day recently. My little fluffy ego bunny was feeling small and in need of cuddling. We all get that way sometimes.

But it’s a quick trip from an ego that’s like this:

(Photo: Captain Subtle)

 To one that looks like this:

(Photo: teletoon)

And which ever state it’s in do you really want some silly rabbit running the show? Sometimes when I look in my ego mirror, I see:

“F*ck yeah, you’re awesome! You are talented and gorgeous and you smell nice and everyone loves you and if they don’t than they can go suck it. Morons!”

And other times it’s more like:

“You suck. You are an opinionated, no-talent hack who will never amount to anything. Your hair is a mess, your life is a mess, and no one likes you so shut up already!”

The thing is, neither one is true. Neither one is healthy. Neither one matters if I really want a mindful life.

So how to stop seeking fluffy bunny ego cuddles all the time?

1. Go outside. Go for a run. In the rain. In December. Get to the highest point you can and look around in amazement of how vast it all is and what a tiny speck you are. Or even look at the stars. Or the ocean. Anything in nature that reminds you how wonderful the world is and that while you are a part of its magnificence–you are a very small part.

2. Shut up. For real. When you listen to other people, shut off the part of you that is waiting for your turn to talk, to explain how it makes you feel or why it relates to you. Give that part a rest and listen to someone else for awhile. You might learn something.

3. Stop seeking ego food. You know, fishing for compliments, seeking validation, looking for approval. And instead…

4. Breathe. Doesn’t have to be fancy, or on a cushion, official mediation time (though that’s a great ego leveller too.) When you feel the sad ego bunny syndrome coming on, instead of trying to find someone to stroke it, stop. Take a few deep breaths. Shake it off. Do something that actually nourishes your soul instead of just revving up your ego. One great way to do this would be…

5. Remember how to be happy. “If you want be happy think first of others, if you want to be unhappy think only of yourself.” It’s true. I love telling other people how much I appreciate them, how they amaze me. Not to feed their egos, not so they’ll reciprocate, but because it’s true. The more time I spend focused on how I can be of benefit to others, the less that stupid bunny begs to be cuddled.

My ego is in check enough at the moment that I can fully admit, Pema Chödrön sums it up much better than I have:

Ego is like a room of your own, a room with a view with the temperature and the smells and the music that you like. You want it your own way. You’d just like to have a little peace, you’d like to have a little happiness, you know, just gimme a break. But the more you think that way, the more you try to get life to come out so that it will always suit you, the more your fear of other people and what’s outside your room grows. Rather than becoming more relaxed, you start pulling down the shades and locking the door. When you do go out, you find the experience more and more unsettling and disagreeable. You become touchier, more fearful, more irritable than ever. The more you try to get it your way, the less you feel at home.

Unlock that door. Stop sitting in there snuggling with your ego or asking others to stroke it for you. Come on out where it’s cold,  wild, wet and unpredictable and you might get a little bruised sometimes. It’s worth it.

Clean water and fresh squeezed lemon is one of the most well tested energy boosters around.

Most people in America rely on caffeinated beverages like coffee to get aroused in the morning. These adrenal stimulants produce dirty energy in the form of blood sugar swings and oxidative stress. Water with lemon produces clean energy by hydrating and oxygenating the body to extraordinary energy and mental clarity.

After sleeping through the night the bodily tissues are dehydrated and need clean, pure water to filter out toxins and improve energy production in the cells. Most individuals turn to stimulants like coffee in the morning to give them a jump start. Unfortunately, coffee is a diuretic that depletes your body of water reserves and essential minerals and electrolytes like sodium, potassium, calcium & magnesium.

People feel energized by coffee due to the effects of caffeine on the adrenal glands. Coffee stimulates these organs to pump out instant energy hormones epinephrine and norepinephrine. These hormones stimulate the body to breakdown stored sugar and release it into the bloodstream. This process causes abnormal blood sugar that increases oxidative stress, free radical formation and overall tissue damage.

This is called dirty energy because it produces a rampant amount of damage to the body in order to activate energy formation. Clean energy produces cellular energy without an excessive load of oxidative stress.

Food as Bioelectrical Energy

The food and beverages we eat provide electrically charged molecules that initiate energy production in our body. An ion is part of a molecule that carries an electrical charge. Positively charged ions are called “cations,” while negatively charged ions are called “anions.”

Most of the food we put into our bodies comes in a cationic form, while our natural digestive processes (hydrochloric acid, digestive enzymes, saliva) are anionic. Lemon is one of the only anionic foods on the planet. This means that it carries a very strong negative charge and is extremely electrically active.

Fresh lemon helps oxygenate the body and maximizes enzyme function. Lemon is known to stimulate the liver’s natural enzymes. This assists the liver in the process of dumping toxins like uric acid and of liquefying congested bile ducts.

Citric Acid Cleanses the System

Citric acid can also play a very important role in chelating out abnormal calcium stones. It has a unique ability to form soluble complexes with calcium that many have used to eliminate pancreatic stones and kidney stones. This mechanism can also help prevent calcium deposits from building up in the arteries that promote cardiovascular disease.

Clean water with lemon provides the body with hydration, anti-oxidants and electrolytes. Lemon is a rich source of the immune boosting vitamin C. It also has good quantities of electrolytes such as potassium, calcium and magnesium. Lemon is a tremendous source of citrus bioflavonoid anti-oxidant phytonutrients that have been given the label Vitamin P.

Vitamin P consists of the flavonoid glycosides hesperetin and naringenin among others. Studies have shown that vitamin P enhances the anti-oxidant capability of vitamin C. These bioflavonoids also improve capillary permeability and overall blood flow. This is especially important for oxygenating tissues and maintaining normal blood pressure. These anti-oxidants have also been shown to reduce swelling, venous backup and edema.

Upon rising take 1 full lemon and squeeze it into 16-32 oz of fresh clean water and drink. Be sure to eat out the membranous parts of the lemon where the majority of the pectin fiber and citrus bioflavonoids are located. Stevia can be added to form sugar-free lemonade. Apple cider vinegar and various herbs can be used to boost enzymatic and anti-oxidant potential.

Sources for this Article Include
http://www.quantumbalancing.com/new…
http://www.nutrition-and-you.com/le…
http://www.naturalnews.com/033649_c…

About the author:
Dr. David Jockers owns and operates Exodus Health Center in Kennesaw, Ga. He is a Maximized Living doctor. His expertise is in weight loss, customized nutrition & exercise, & structural corrective chiropractic care. For more information go towww.exodushc.com

Are you are holding onto a past disappointment (one that keeps repeating itself)? A grudge against someone? The pain of a betrayal in trust?

“It’s their fault if only they could see!” If forgiveness is the way to inner peace, how do we shift to this place, and heal? It requires a paradigm shift in our thinking to embrace a well known, but rarely practiced wisdom…

“There is no right or wrong, but thinking makes it so.” ~ Shakespeare

We have a need  to ‘be right’ that keeps us stuck in feeling ‘wronged’ by others. It is so powerful, we can’t see it in ourselves. Resentment, stress, bitterness, anger or worse shows up we’ve unknowingly created. Why do we do this?

We’ve been wired to look for answers linearly, outside of ourselves. We are programmed to understand the world in black and white, and expanding our minds requires breaking out of your own box. Not easy.

What about what someone has said or done that you know is wrong?  Words and behaviour we experience as unloving, unkind, selfish, or destructive we label as ‘wrong’, but when we project that energy of a painful experience, or our ‘right’ onto someone, we shift into judgment.

Can sound like: “How selfish, and inconsiderate! They don’t deserve my love, kindness, or respect, and should be punished, taught a lesson. Pay for what they’ve done. They should know better.” We move to a position of superiority, and look down upon someone.

We see a person as an object that needs to be corrected, convinced, controlled or changed (what I call the 4 C’s). We condemn someone based on our “truth”, stepping into self-righteousness yet “truth is in the eye of the beholder”. When you see someone as a human being with their own life-time of social conditioning, beliefs, interpretations, and experiences – you can suddenly see yourself. How can someone choose to be worse than who they are? Our best is all anyone can be. Doesn’t mean your ‘best’ will look anything like someone else’s ‘best’.

Notice when you use the word ‘should’ with someone as in “You should be…”. This is you projecting your ‘right’ way onto others.

Notice it with yourself. Self-judgment. “I should have…”

We create expectations that lead to disappointment. Yes I’m saying let go of having expectations of others! Instead believe everyone is simply doing their best with their own reality, aren’t you? : )

You do not condone someone’s words or actions when you forgive them. This is the belief that keeps you stuck! We can choose to distance ourself, or walk away if someone’s energy is destructive without condemning them. It’s when we condemn others that we suffer.

Forgiveness does not excuse destructive behaviour nor does it absolve responsibility, but it is not our lesson to learn. We do not ‘own’ other people to give us the right to force others to behave out of fear, duty, obligation, and projecting your expectations. It can get results, but is it the way you want to live? The way you earn respect is not to demand it, but to model it. Fear separates, love connects.

We have collective rules, guidelines, values, and ideals in place intended to keep us safe, happy, and living in peace. Not everyone is willing, or wanting your influence. You must discern if someone is ready to see, and hear your truth. The essence of trust comes from your ability to trust yourself, and it requires finding your own truth.

Your ability to forgive does not mean others will be remorseful. Many are far away from their spirit (love) from years of verbal abuse, self-judgment, being told they are not good enough, and feeling obligated to live up to expectations desperately wanting what we all do: to be seen, and heard for who we are. They sadly make choices that keep them in the victim mindset of depending on others, and circumstances for their happiness. They falsely believe that others are the cause of their suffering, and don’t know how to trust themselves or others.

“God, spare me from the desire for love, approval, or appreciation.”

~Byron Katie

Do not believe others cause you to be miserable or feel guilty because they don’t have that power over you. Nor do they have the ability to ‘make you happy’. This is an illusion. Your experience of sadness or joy comes from within. You don’t have the power to change how someone else thinks, you can only influence those who want to change themselves. Would you want anyone imposing their values on you?

Trying to convince someone they are wrong automatically puts them on the defensive. No one believes they are wrong.  People make mistakes, it’s how we learn, but being sorry means you are able to see what you are taking responsibility for. The mind can justify anything when you believe you are right.

Hitler thought he was right. So did Gandhi. Who was right? Neither one – it’s the wrong question. One lived in fear (ego) – control, convincing, correcting, and changing others, and the other lived in compassion (higher self) – loving, sharing, teaching, modelling. The impact was constructive or destructive. It’s a choice.

Saying “I’m sorry things turned out this way, but it was because of this reason, or that person” essentially means “it’s not my fault”.  It being anyone’s fault is another illusion. Taking responsibility is seeing beyond finding fault, and looking to blame. If everyone is doing their best, how can it be someone’s fault? It’s the same as making someone wrong.

Focus on whether the words or behaviour results in a constructive (loving)

or destructive (unloving) experience.

The moment you release judgment, you can step into compassion – a higher level of consciousness where love resides. Doesn’t mean we don’t get angry, frustrated or annoyed. But raving mad, resentful, and speaking words and actions we’ll later regret is the path of judgment. Someone famous once said, “Forgive them Father, for they know not what they do”. (Luke 23:34)

Love never condemns, it is our ego consciousness living in fear that needs to ‘be right’, and needs to be ‘good enough’. We are already perfect, and connected through one consciousness. What you do others, you do to yourself. What you give comes back.

The freedom of forgiveness arrives when you surrender your own judgment and practice living in compassion by seeing that we are all human beings doing the best we can.

Editor’s Note: This is a contribution by Carolyn Hidalgo

“Love is saying, ‘I feel differently’ instead of ‘you’re wrong.’” ~Unknown

We seek it, want it, need it yet it eludes so many of us: genuine heart-felt unconditional love. Not infatuation, lust, or what you think makes you happy, but true intimacy at the level of your soul.

How do we create deep authentic connections with those who matter most? Love seems to come in precious moments that we can’t seem to grasp before time and our busy lives takes its toll. Must we try so hard to make love work? Doesn’t love just flow?

We hear about unconditional love, that we must love ourselves first before we can love another. It requires something so simple, yet difficult in practice: letting go of making ourselves, and others, wrong.

When you make someone else wrong, you hold the energy of needing to correct, convince, control ,or change someone else (the 4 C’s as I call them). Someone should “be or do” the way you expect. Blaming, complaining, or condemning becomes acceptable.

When you make yourself wrong, you hold thoughts of how you should be, and end up feeling not good enough. We now see ourselves and others as objects or problems that need to be fixed.

I grew up in the most loving, caring, stable family environment with three brothers and two sisters. Being the eldest girl, I followed the rules and learned what was right and wrong.

My parents, both physicians, worked hard and instilled strong values of kindness, respect, and education. It was critical we each have an independent profession. It made sense, and we became three physicians, two MBAs, and me, a Chartered Accountant.

We all lead happy personal and professional lives. All married with 15 children among us, we get along with virtually zero drama or conflict, and have the most amazing family get-togethers. We look forward to the holidays, and numerous birthday celebrations. Surprisingly, it turned out we are the exception.

I attribute the harmony we experience to my mother who gives of herself like no other with an uncanny ability to not complain about anything. She is one smart, highly productive woman.

Logical with astounding common sense, she instilled high self-esteem—the secret ingredient to happiness. What about love? It didn’t need to be expressed to certainly know I was loved. Yet something was missing.

There was criticism, and judgment growing up I couldn’t see—right and wrong and good and bad. It was not just in my family, it was everywhere.

Expectations of how we were to behave, what we were supposed to know, who were expected to be, and the kind of person we needed to marry were clear.

When I switched careers to become a life coach and writer, I suddenly found myself on a spiritual path. Suddenly I was learning things that did not fit with my “family norms.” I quickly learned what I could no longer share.

Harmony exists because everyone knows what to say and what not say. The moment I stepped out of my “family box,” something shifted. My happiness grew, and I unexpectedly discovered what unconditional love meant. I learned that happiness is a changing state of being, and love can be experienced on many different levels.

But what about things people say and do that have destructive consequences?

Many believe love is putting up with, sacrificing, tolerating, or suffering in silence thinking their commitment is proof of their love. This is not love.

Understanding, seeing, hearing, and accepting someone for who they are is love.

When you make someone wrong, there’s a value you hold being stepped on. It’s black and white in your mind, but in between lives everyone else’s perception of truth.

Someone not living up to your value of “hard work” you may judge as “lazy.” Someone who does not follow your idea of “giving” you may judge as “selfish.” Someone you judge as “inconsiderate” is not acting in a way you see as “kindness.”

Notice how it feels when others project their values onto you. The question is not whether someone is right or wrong, but whether the words and actions are coming from the spectrum of fear on one side or love on the other. The result will be either constructive or destructive.

Extreme fear breeds hatred leading to very destructive consequences that Hitler created in the world he lived in. Extreme love leads to compassion, and what Mother Teresa created in the world she lived in.

When you let go of needing others to live according to your “right” way, you realize how others respond is simply a projection of their reality. 

A shift can now happen away from your fear-based ego, toward love and compassion where you can seek to understand, share, teach, and model. Trying to be patient is next to impossible in the place of fear, but shift to love and you will find all the patience you need.

We are all seeking truth, but truth is in the eye of the beholder. Discernment not judgment leads you to truth by getting curious and noticing whether someone’s perception of reality comes from love or fear. It’s the difference between competition and cooperation; doubt and trust. It will lead to holding on or letting go.

You stand in a place of superiority when you judge, and see others as inferior. It’s a destructive energy of being attached to “I am right” that you project onto someone else. Notice that what comes back will be defensiveness because no one believes they are “wrong.” Criticism is also being attached to “I am right,” but you don’t necessarily see someone as inferior.

The Golden Rule found in all spiritual teachings: are you treating someone the way you want to be treated? Who wants to be treated to criticism and judgment?

When you let go of convincing, correcting, controlling, and trying to change others, you release a big illusion in love: ownership.

Your ego can convince you that belonging to someone is wonderful, but it’s the opposite. Having the independence to share your true self and allow others the same brings true intimacy.

No one makes you happy; happiness is found within. Until you live in compassion with yourself, the love you give will be conditional.

We are each a unique expression raised from birth to the present day living our truth based on our own values, beliefs, experience, and understanding. In every given moment we can only “be and do” our “best.” Your “best” will not be the same as someone else’s “best.”

We cling to love wanting it to last forever, but it cannot for we are the ones carrying that love, and we are constantly evolving.

The love we share is either growing together or growing apart. The paradox is love can grow apart, but it can also grow stronger.

I married someone who fit the idea of what I thought was “right,” and my awareness at that time of what I thought would bring me happiness. It has.

I thought this was love, but it was conditional, and that’s why it felt like something was missing. Now I know differently, and there is a lot more authenticity. We are closer than we’ve ever been.

The secret to experiencing deeper love is allowing each other to grow.

Today, I experience the most profound sense of love I have ever known especially with my three children where I needed to let go of criticizing and judging them.

I’ve learned that love is wanting others to be happy without it needing it to be about you. This is how I know I love my husband, children, family, and friends, even my clients. They are not dependent on me for their happiness, and I am not dependent on them.

It’s when I can show up without criticism and judgment and I allow them to be exactly who they are that love is exchanged.

Unconditional love doesn’t always come the family we were born into because criticism, judgment, and the resulting expectations are a big part of family culture.

Family love is strong, lasting, and nothing compares, but experiencing unconditional love will often require you to break free from the “family circle” to follow your heart, and your own truth.

True love is eternal even if a relationship grows apart. When you surrender judgment, you will see the divine in everyone, including you. This is love.

Roger’s dedication to the care of the dying followed an enlightening experience in 1984. Since then he has sought to integrate spirituality and his medical role through meditation, with a vocation to bring hope, comfort and healing to his patients and their families. 

Roger has appeared in several TV documentaries, including a personal profile of his work on the ABC. He was also featured in Bryce Courtenay’s book April Fool’s Day, as Damon Courtenay’s palliative care physician. 

Roger has toured Australia and overseas extensively, giving public talks on hospice care, meditation, inner-healing and spirituality. He speaks on the sensitive issues that face us in death and is equally versed in how to maintain inner peace and happiness. He believes in the connection of mind, body and spirit, the power of positive thoughts and how attitudes influence healing. 

His published articles include grief repression in breast cancer, caring for people with advanced AIDS, symptom-control in palliative care, meditation for health-professionals and spiritual care of the dying.

Interview with Dr Roger Cole

Do you see yourself as a leader?  What is your vision?

Actually I never really have seen myself as a leader, yet when I reflect I have often held leadership roles, even from childhood. Things like house captain, soccer club captain, prefect and the like. I have never thought about leadership or considered the qualities that make people leaders. Some people simply are, its in their make-up and others look at them and follow their ideas or example. 

I think in the early formative years my leadership roles were the result of enthusiasm, self-confidence, determination and commitment to what I was involved in, as well as the capacity to instil those same feelings in others. In more recent times, in becoming a palliative care physician, there were other factors. In fact being a director of services wasn't the outcome of leadership, although it has challenged me to develop and understand what is needed to keep the respect and cooperation of others. When I set out in palliative care it was still the mid-eighties and modern hospice as we now know it didn't exist. I just wanted to express my medicine in a more compassionate way. There was no structure, just a burning desire to make a difference. Undoubtedly this was, in part, about ego-gratification, to be recognised and to be a hero! (Possibly a common trait in leaders of today.) As there was no structure I was advised by my oncology supervisors that there was no future in the direction I was taking. However I could feel the need out there, and shared the vision with a number of other doctors who were breaking the mould. I didn't believe the advice I was being given and determined to follow my heart.

I became one of the early pioneers of modern hospice in Australia (there were good overseas models at the time it must be said). As people witnessed the value of my clinical work a position was created for me at the Prince Henry and Prince of Wales Hospital in 1988 as the director of Palliative Care, so I was thrown into leadership. This time it was because there was no-one else to lead! The qualities that got me there probably included those listed above but you could now add the word vision. I had seen a need and focused myself on an approach to meet it. I wasn't put off by those who sought to undermine this new direction and completely believed in myself. I was 'sent' the right people who could materialise the vision, including those with power over resources and funding. I just kept on working, demonstrating the value of serving with compassion and focusing on suffering. A team began to grow around me as the palliative care association of NSW made political inroads into resourcing palliative care as a mainstream service in medicine. 

At first there was the pioneer spirit, then the need to adapt and become a sustainer of an established service . Many of the pioneers fell away at this stage. As we became established it was no longer the same energy. It was no longer about satisfying ego, challenging the establishment and winning a battle. Now it was becoming more the challenge of longer term goals, strengthening our position and having more sustainable aims and objectives than just saying how needed we were. At this point leadership was about the power to accommodate others, to take a gentler approach, to provide education and support to other health workers, and to be humble. One challenge I had when taking my current position was to improve the quality of care being provided by less experienced doctors in a hospice setting. I quickly realised that my extra knowledge could be used to good effect. However, if I was too arrogant and assertive with it I would have undermined their confidence. It was a delicate balance. What point is having extra knowledge and experience if you make people lose their self-respect, or if they don't like you or want to listen to you? Leadership isn't a popularity contest but imparting your values does require an open, honest and friendly nature that will acquire trust and cooperation. It is also really important to respect everyone.

Always remember: When you give trust to someone they will acquire self-respect. They will also respect you and be cooperative. And when you communicate your motives people will feel valued and they will feel that they belong. They will also be understanding when you fail to do so. Good leaders are always forgiven when they get it wrong! 

What attracted you to the medical profession, in particular the area of oncology, when you began your career and what do you continue to find meaningful in your line of work?

My mother and a frog. My mother definitely wanted me to be a doctor, in fact it was her own unfulfilled wish. From the cradle it was, 'Be a doctor, be a doctor'! I was completely brainwashed. When I was around ten years old, however, a neighbouring (older) child dissected a frog. I was fascinated by what lay inside and, from that day on, began to study biology which became my favourite subject. Actually it was from that defining moment that I decided to be a doctor, a direction that would never falter or change. Destiny had called.

Being attracted to oncology wasn't a particularly deep affair either! In fact I was going to be a cardiologist. Cardiologist was more in line with my ego-image of 'hero who saves lives'. But it's very interesting how our destiny is shaped. What happened next would be connected to my future spiritual journey, bearing in mind that I was an atheist at this time. One night at 3am I woke up and found myself sitting bolt upright in bed with one thought in my mind: 'Become an oncologist'. It really seemed as if it had come from somewhere else. The following morning I approached our oncologists at the teaching hospital I was training in and they accepted me. The door opened fully when I passed my specialty exam and a colleague who was competing and preferred for the training position failed. Such is the nature of destiny. When you step forward with courage everything comes easily, doors open wide and it's as if it was meant to be. And of course it always is!

How did you come to the point in your life when you became spiritually aware in your role as a Palliative Care Specialist?

In the next year as an oncology trainee I had an awakening of compassion and empathy. As you can see these weren't the motives that had taken me there so far, more it had been about keeping a date with destiny. Now I wanted to understand the suffering of my patients and their relatives. I begin to think less about the medicine and more about the experience of going through cancer with the threat and reality of death. What was it like? How could I help? Why did it happen?

I got more involved with my patients and listened to them. To my surprise they appreciated me in a way I hadn't expected. I was interested in what they were going through and they felt this to be human kindness. I was just beginning to understand that empathy, listening to and understanding the feelings of others, is as helpful as anything we can do. I started to communicate and educate in my role as a doctor, making sure my patients had all the information they needed to be clearer about their position. This gave them a sense of control and a feeling of mastery about their situation and a sense of what they had to do, instead of being in fear and limbo. 

At this point I went to a workshop on death and dying with Elisabeth Kubler-Ross. She did a lot of teaching on death and dying in the seventies and eighties, and wrote the landmark book, 'On Death and Dying'. Elisabeth believed that workers in palliative care have to face their own losses, the sources of grief and anger that rest in our subconscious, before we can adequately respond to the despair of others. During the workshop I broke down and grieved the loss of my sister who died a 'cot death' when I was ten. What followed was remarkable. From the moment my heart emptied of grief I experienced total peace and silence, then the purest love I have ever known. I felt myself 'expand' into a love that was all-inclusive. Every aspect of life, the universe, nature and all souls were there. I was, quite literally 'one-with-all'. This was my defining spiritual experience. I had been an atheist. Now I recognised this was an experience of God's ever-present unconditional, spiritual love. I had just let go and fallen in it!

It was this new-found spiritual awareness that drew me to work in palliative care, where I felt I could better express my 'whole self' in serving people who were suffering.

 How has your personal journey towards a life beyond changed you?

Discovering that I was an eternal being, a spirit and a child of God changed everything about my life. It inspired me to seek the wisdom of that experience, and to develop its understanding and expression in my daily life. I began to meditate. This was eighteen years ago now. I studied 'A Course in Miracles' and various other texts as an adjunct to meditation, and meditation was my way of being absorbed into God's purity and silence. The study enabled me to develop the power and virtues of my mind, while meditation drew purity and divinity into my heart. I found myself able to discern more clearly the truth behind our life, and I developed the courage and faith to live that truth. I found that as I 'cooperated with the universe' in this way 'the universe would cooperate with me'. My life became simpler and I could trust in outcomes. Conflict began to leave me alone and everything I did succeeded, in fact I began to view success as my birthright. Happiness came first, success second. The world outside had it all wrong. They think it's the other way round...but then they have forgotten the magic that a pure and direct realisation of your soul can bring.

What is the essence of the message you are aiming to communicate in your books, Mission of Love and Healing Heart and Soul?

That we are spiritual beings, that we are all children of the One God and that we can transform the world we live in. Developing our spirituality through knowledge, yoga (union with God through meditation), divinity and service is a way of cooperating with God to create a new world. In truth this is the only real leadership that remains in this world. It brings us into our highest values and makes us act only according to these. Ultimately this will end ego and all illusions will fade into the truth and certainty of the unseen world of spirit. When we make this apparent and revealed the whole world will follow because we will have succeeded in becoming free instruments of divine will.

How has your message been received by your medical colleagues?  Would you like to see them approach Medicine with such an orientation?

I heard of a recent executive meeting where palliative care was discussed. Someone was asked to approach me about something. The medical CEO quipped, 'Has anyone seen Roger Cole recently...is he still on earth!' Everyone laughed. I like the story and I like to be different. My medical colleagues like the message but it takes effort and discipline to become the embodiment of the message. My medicine is orthodox, based on good rapport, communication and effective prescribing. My mind is unorthodox and I am willing to openly live my beliefs. My feet are grounded in this world, my intellect connected with the world of spirit. Because there is this balance of spiritual with worldly life my colleagues respect me, and sometimes wish they could have the same peace of mind. They like the message but few understand or know how to heed it.

Doctors are a product of the society we live in. We look at them and wish they were different, better communicators, etc. Sometimes we get angry with them. But we are unwilling to look at ourselves and say, 'It's my fault that doctors are like they are. I have to change.' Until we are willing to change ourselves, to begin the journey of purifying our attitudes, vision and actions we will not see that consciousness expressed in our society. Our doctors, politicians, scientists and businessmen will continue to be as they are. What you see is a reflection of what you have become. Now believe in making a difference. I have been studying Raja Yoga meditation for the last ten years. Our slogan is: When we change the world changes.

What are some of the dynamics of contemporary western society that concern you and what do you feel is needed to effect changes in those areas?

First and foremost I don't think in terms of right and wrong. I accept the world as it is and have no tensions with its values. If you take this position you can look on the world as an observer and develop the inner wisdom required to change and recreate the society we live in. Western society has trapped the spirit in three forms of lower consciousness - body consciousness, role consciousness and ego consciousness. We have lost our innocence to these three 'dark forces', which have modelled and limited our perception. Greed, self-gratification, conflict and competition are the outcomes of these perceptual states of mind. Deep within our subconscious we live in a state of fear, yet fear can be best understood through the mnemonic: False Evidence Appearing Real.

To effect change the world tries to isolate problems externally and enforce change. This always fails to create the world we want, and I believe it always will. When we change the world changes. If we have deep courage, faith and conviction we will begin to understand that only a change in consciousness, and a radical shift in our 'being' will lead to a peaceful community. We need to understand that the true underlying personality of every human soul is peace, and the foundation for peace is purity. If we awaken these powerful qualities through meditation and contemplation we become the living solutions. And when the world plunges further into darkness those who pay attention to this awakening now will become the living lighthouses of the future - spiritual beings become the embodiment of solutions instead of problem-solvers. 

To effect change keep remembering you are a peaceful soul. This tunes your awareness to the nature, form and divinity of God. God does the rest. Your responsibility is to change the self. God's responsibility is to change the world. This is known in Raja Yoga as: Self-transformation for World-transformation.

Where does current western religious philosophies sit in the context of your personal spiritual journey and what insights have you found in eastern religions that have helped you in your journey?

I now feel that truth lies in the experience of soul, and that God is the source of truth - the all knowing, ocean of love, peace and happiness. The word experience is the key to understanding the self, the cycle of life called the drama, the unique role each human being plays in this drama and the opportunities of the age we live in. I believe this is the time to become living angels who reveal God. For this I believe we need to solve the question: 'Who Am I?', and ask two other questions: 'Where do I come from?', and 'Who do I belong to?' These questions will never be answered through the head. They need to be experienced repeatedly until we feel we have a relationship with God. With the feeling of relationship comes knowing, and with knowing comes faith. Faith is really living your beliefs in four aspects: faith in drama (everything is in divine order, nothing to fear), faith in the family (all are my brothers, each playing his or her part accurately), faith in the self (I am a soul, God's child) and faith in God (the Supreme is the One who inspires action and gets everything done, I am simply an instrument).

Faith in four aspects allows us to be detached and beyond the illusions of roles and ego. Our loving and compassion is then unconditional, we become servers in our communities, and peace messengers in our world. This moving beyond illusion is the result of living the truth of our spiritual identity, that is of becoming soul conscious. Soul conscious love is the foundation and the essence of truth in all our religious philosophies, and it was in the message of all our religious founders. Unfortunately in their expansion religions have lost this original essence. This is true of east and west. Raja Yoga is more a contemporary study of the self, of God and the cycles of life than a religion.

I have respect for all the religions of the world and believe that each soul has their own unique family of souls, and that this is a unique age for experiencing God in our own special way. It doesn't matter if you break with the traditions of your religion to do so. If you love God, or you love the journey to wisdom and understanding you are 'allowed' to give yourself the freedom to create your own journey. At some point, though, you will need to follow some directions other than your own to experience the humility that brings you into unity with God's spirit.

What general advice would you like to give those who are caring for those who are terminally ill and dying?

Accept the person you are caring for and accept what you have to do at this time. I wouldn't pretend that caring for someone who is dying is easy, in fact it can be physically and mentally draining. It can also be a time of real beauty, learning and growth for carers. But remember some of our greatest moments of growth come through the difficulties and challenges of our lives. Living with feelings of helplessness and inadequacy are commonly experienced. The situation can feel overwhelming and much greater than us, and there is the feeling that we have lost control. When you are able to do things for the person your helplessness is, at least, alleviated but you have to temper this with respect for the independence of the individual who needs to keep their sense of identity. Some people are very stubborn. If this is the case your great challenge is to accept them as they are and negotiate safety if they are weak and at risk of falling. It is better that they fall and find out for themselves, however, than you spend weeks in conflict trying to protect them.

When there is suffering (in the carer and the person who is sick) spiritual ideals and philosophies may not be helpful. Going through the experience may be the only way to freedom. Steering away from religion and being practical with your support and care is most useful here. If you have religion but the person you are caring for doesn't just let them experience the love and peace of your faith. Its good to talk about things to do with dying but not essential if that's not the way for that person. People are still people and have the same needs as always for lightness, superficial chit-chat and humour. We don't have to be deep about dying. Be natural, don't make people feel uncomfortable but be willing to sit with your grief and to let your feelings show. This encourages the person who is sick to allow their feelings to surface, otherwise the whole period can become a kind of frustrating emotional 'hide and seek' where everyone becomes more afraid of their feelings showing than of the situation that they are in. 

Please remember there is a spiritual dimension, that all suffering is a temporary adjustment for the soul and that it doesn't matter whether you believe or not. Every soul is accountable for its actions but will experience liberation and peace once the account has finished...and the account always finishes. Never give up hope, always be loving and learn the compassion that difficulties bring.

What happens if Australia's property market goes in a similar direction to that of the United States and, increasingly, the United Kingdom? The implications for the American and British banking systems have been far reaching with both economies in, or teetering on the edge of, recession. Will similar problems start to beset the Australian banking system and, by extension, the Australian economy?

Possibly not. On the face of it, house prices are extremely high, 30 per cent above the 80 year average. Australian house prices are among the most expensive in the world. According to the consultancy Demographia, they are in the “severely unaffordable” range, when compared with median household incomes: about a fifth more expensive than houses in the United Kingdom and almost double American prices (on the relative measure). Viewed purely as a financial asset, a severe correction seems almost certain.

Yet there are a number of countervailing forces. One is a shortage of housing supply, exacerbated by high levels of immigration into Australia’s capital cities. Another is that housing loans in Australia are not non-recourse loans as they are in America. This means that in America lenders can hand back the keys to a house and all they have is a bad credit rating. In Australia, defaulters still owe any money that is not recouped by the sale of the house. Accordingly, they stay as long as they can in the house. Better to be indebted and in a home than indebted and homeless.

The effect of Australia’s unusually generous negative gearing laws also favours property as a financial asset, reducing the likelihood of a sharp fall. But with more than a million households predicted to experience some kind of mortgage stress, according to Fujitsu Consulting, the possibility for a sharp sell-off certainly exists.

If there is a sharp downturn in housing, it could set off a negative spiral by forcing banks to reduce lending to accommodate weaker asset prices, which in turn would contribute to weaker asset prices. The possibility exists of something akin to a credit squeeze. In the short term, the four main banks have been lending aggressively to soak up the market share vacated by the non-bank lenders and regional banks. They now dominate most of the new lending.

But this process is almost over, and the banks are now moving into a deleveraging phase to reduce their exposure. At the moment, the leverage ratio of Australian banks is 18 times equity, the highest level since the Asian financial crisis and “entirely inconsistent with a slowing economy”, according to a report by Goldman Sachs JBWere.

The report estimates that if the value of assets on balance sheets for all financial intermediaries were to fall by 0.5 per cent, or bad debts rose by 0.5 per cent, then the leverage ratio of banks would rise. This could mean that the cycle of easy money leading to a bubble in the property market could turn into its opposite: restricted or expensive money that ends up pricking the property bubble.

If property assets on banks’ balance sheets were to fall sharply – be it houses or commercial property – the leverage ratios would rise even higher. That would encourage banks to reduce lending, something they are already intent on doing (despite their leverage ratios being much more healthy than their American or British counterparts).

Goldman Sachs estimates that just reducing banks’ current leverage from 18 back to a more acceptable 16 times would require credit to slow by $180 billion. If the value of their assets were to fall sharply because of a sharp property price fall, or because their bad debts continue to spiral – both the Australian and New Zealand Banking Group (ANZ) and the National Australia Bank (NAB) recently reported billion dollar write downs – then the credit taps could be turned off even more aggressively.

Australia’s stock of wealth is skewed more towards property than in the United States. The so-called “wealth effect”, where rising house prices give owners the impression that they are rich, encouraging them to consume more aggressively, is more applicable to Australia than America. Accordingly, a sharp fall in house prices would probably have a more depressing effect on consumer sentiment and the overall economy.

The total value of shares on the Australian Securities Exchange is about $1.5 trillion. The total value of Australia’s 8.3 million dwellings is $3.7 trillion. In the United States the value of houses and shares is more in balance. The stock market is worth $US15 trillion, while the housing market is worth about $US20 trillion. In the United Kingdom, the stock market is only about a third of the value of housing, which is over $9 trillion, and so a “negative wealth effect” would be felt more keenly.

Look closer and more than a third of the capitalisation of the Australian stock market is accounted for by the financial sector (including property trusts). These companies derive a substantial portion of their business from property lending. The conclusion? Australia is not so much riding on the sheep’s back as on the roof of stellar house prices.

The mining boom in Australia is being depicted as an epochal shift in Australia’s industry base. Less noticed is that it follows another profound change in how the Australian economy is structured. Over the last two decades, the industrial economy has been replaced by a financial economy. “We have made money for each other by borrowing and building houses and taking fees off that,” says one fund manager. “It equals a balance of payments problem.” Capital, especially banking capital, was kept thin, mainly through the use of off-balance sheet mechanisms.

This shift to the financial economy has in Australia been inseparable from the rising value of property, and it poses a threat to the banking system. It is true that domestic banks have mostly avoided the excesses of sub-prime mortgage lending and the credit crisis that are crippling the American financial system and increasingly harming British banking.

Australian lending practices have for the most part been more sane. The big write-downs by the NAB and the ANZ, big as they are, can justly claim to be on the margin. If many American and European banks were so aggressive in writing off their exposures to collateralised debt obligations and other forms of securitised instruments, they would probably no longer be in existence.

The heavy dependence of Australia’s capital base on property still makes Australian banking, and the economy, vulnerable to a downturn in prices. Australia’s financial system may have avoided the post-modern absurdities of the current global credit crisis, with its blizzard of meta-instruments underpinned by Triple-A ratings that apparently are not worth the rating agency they are written on. The NAB’s 90 per cent write-down of $1.2 billion of securities backed by US home loans was all theoretically Triple-A debt.

But the financial system is still vulnerable to a more conventional credit squeeze because of a fall in property values. The rise in local house prices cannot be divorced from the series of global asset bubbles that have emerged since 2001 as a result of the US Federal Reserve’s loose monetary policy, sparked by its efforts to avoid Japan-style deflation. This led to an era of cheap debt that Australian financial companies, particularly real estate property trusts, exploited aggressively.

It also led to many Australian businesses profiting from borrowing and investing in property. JP Morgan analyst Brian Johnson notes that the surge of business lending since 2002 is not explained by concomitant increases in capital expenditure or inventory build up. Instead, the debt was channelled into  commercial property on an increasingly geared basis, pushing yields on commercial property at the end of 2007 down to historical lows compared with interest rates.

That game is well and truly over. But it only serves to further underline how dependent the Australian economy has become on its property bubble.

On the face of it, Australian banks are not especially vulnerable to a run on housing. A “stress test” by the investment bank UBS, for instance, recently concluded that there would only be total major bank mortgage losses of approximately $1 billion if there is a recession similar to that now afflicting the United Kingdom. UBS suggested that the Commonwealth Bank would have possible losses of $300 million, the NAB and ANZ $250 million and Westpac $200 million.

But if there is one lesson from the global credit crisis, it is that assumptions about risk management are not always reliable. In fact they can be downright dangerous. Nasty surprises can and do occur, and the easy ride of the last five years seems to have turned vicious.

The “finance economy” that has so benefited the Australian stock market and Australian economy appears to be at the end of its run. Until the credit crisis, property was scarce, and capital and most consumers goods plentiful.

Now, capital is scarce, although arguably housing property is also still scarce in Australia. However, new scarcities are emerging that will shift attention away from property. Most obvious are price rises in fuel and food, but increasingly energy will become problematic. The notion that nothing is safer than “bricks and mortar” seems to have run its course, and the stresses on Australia’s financial system may prove to be severe.

by Nikki

10

Paradox of Value

Also known as the Diamond-Water Paradox, the paradox of value is the contradiction that while water is more useful, in terms of survival, than diamonds, diamonds get a higher market price. The argument could be made that diamonds are more rare than water, thus, demand is higher than supply, which means that price will go up. However, consider the fact that less than 1% of the earth’s water is drinkable. Also consider the fact that access to clean drinking water is one of the world’s most pressing problems, every year 2 million people die and half a billion become sick from a lack of drinkable water.

This paradox can possibly be explained by the Subjective Theory of Value, which says that worth is based on the wants and needs of a society, as opposed to value being inherent to an object. In developed countries, drinkable water in not only abundant, it’s considered a right. Because we do not have to worry about paying for water, this gives us money to pay for things like diamonds, that do not fall out of our faucets. Individuals in developing countries surely place a higher value on clean water.

9

Khazzoom–Brookes Postulate

This proposal was named after economists Daniel Khazzoom and Leonard Brookes, who argued that increased energy efficiency, paradoxically, tends to lead to increased energy consumption. It was found to be true in the 1990’s. So how is this possible? Wikipedia explains it very effectively:

“Increased energy efficiency can increase energy consumption by three means. Firstly, increased energy efficiency makes the use of energy relatively cheaper, thus encouraging increased use. Secondly, increased energy efficiency leads to increased economic growth, which pulls up energy use in the whole economy. Thirdly, increased efficiency in any one bottleneck resource multiplies the use of all the companion technologies, products and services that were being restrained by it.”

8

Bounded Rationality

Economic theory generally assumes that individuals are completely rational, and as such, make rational decisions. Recent books on behavioral economics, notably Dan Ariely’s Predictably Irrational have brought forth evidence that people do not make rational decisions at all. Bounded Rationality is the idea that individual decision making is limited by personal information, cognitive limitations, and time constraints.

The basic idea of economics is that people act in ways to maximize their self-interest. We do things that will increase our “utility”, or happiness. It seems logical that we would make rational decisions in order to accomplish that. Unfortunately, information asymmetry (described below), cognitive biases (read about them in my previous list) and other factors conspire to bound our rationality, and people often make choices that lead to outcomes that go against their desires.

7

Lipstick Effect

Economics has many categories for “goods”. “Luxury Goods” are items that people buy more of as their income rises, as opposed to “Necessity Goods” like food and shelter, whose demand is unrelated to income. Examples of luxury goods include fine jewelry, expensive sports cars and designer clothing. The Lipstick Effect is the theory that during an economic calamity, people buy more less costly luxury goods. Instead of buying a fur coat, people will buy expensive lipstick. The idea is that people buy luxury goods even during economic hardships, they will just choose goods that have less of an impact on their funds. Other less expensive luxury goods besides cosmetics include expensive beer and small gadgets.

Interesting Fact: After the 9/11 terrorist attacks on America, lipstick sales doubled.

6

Tragedy of the Commons

The tragedy of the commons is a situation in which multiple individuals, acting independently, deplete a shared resource, even when it is not in anyone’s interest to do so. The best current example of this is fishermen. Nobody owns the earth’s fish populations, indeed, they are a shared resource. Fish are a good that people the world over consume, and as a result, there are multiple fisherman competing for these fish. Each fisherman will try to catch as many fish as possible in order to maximize his profits. However, it is also in the fishermen’s best interest to sustain the fish populations, i.e., leaving enough fish to repopulate, so that down the road, there are still fish to be caught. If each fisherman is concerned with sustainability, and they should be if they don’t want to find new careers in the near future, they theoretically will work to preserve the fish populations. Here is the problem: there is a lack of trust. A fisherman that acts responsibly and limits the amount he catches will be screwed if all the other fisherman do not. The other fisherman get more fish than he does, make more in profits, and will ultimately deplete the fish population anyway. So each fisherman, believing that the others will take more than their sustainable share, will take as many fish as he can, and the world’s fish supplies will deplete, even though no one wants them to.

5

Tragedy of the AntiCommons

The opposite of the above mentioned tragedy of the commons, the anticommons is a situation where too many owners (and bureaucratic red tape) discourages accomplishment of a socially desirable outcome. The classic example is patents. If a product requires multiple components or techniques patented by different people or companies, then it becomes difficult, time consuming and very costly to negotiate with all the owners, and the product may not be produced. This can be a huge loss if the product is in great demand or would have great social benefits. Everybody loses in this situation, the patent holders, the would-be manufacturers and the consumers who would have bought the product.

Interesting fact: A single microchip contains up to 5,000 different patents. No one can create a microchip unless every single patent holder agrees to license their patent.

4

Perverse Incentives

A perverse incentive is an incentive that has an unintended and undesirable effect which is opposite to the initial interests. A type of unintended consequences, perverse incentives are the result of an honest good intention. A historical example illustrates the problem: 19th century paleontologists traveling to China used to pay peasants for each piece of dinosaur bone that they presented. It was later found the peasants found bones and then smashed them into many pieces, which significantly reduced their scientific value, to get more payments. More modern examples include paying architects and engineers based on project costs, which leads to excessively costly projects as they overspend unnecessarily to make income.

3

Information Asymmetry

Information asymmetry is a prevalent issue in economics. In most sales transactions, the seller has more information than the buyer, and as such has the opportunity to try to pass off low quality or defective products for higher prices. This leads to buyer distrust and the old idiom: Buyer Beware.

Adverse selection is a market process where information asymmetry causes negative results. A good example is health insurance. Insurance companies depend on a mix of clients: they need a certain number of healthy individuals (low-risk) to pay premiums and not use a lot of services so that the premium prices can average out. However, the people most likely to buy health insurance are people who need it because of health problems (high-risk). These people are more costly to the insurance companies because they need more services than a healthy person. The insurance companies do not know every new policy applicants health status (but they certainly do everything in their power to find out as much as they can), and this lack of information requires the companies to raise premiums to mitigate the risk. This increase in premiums causes the healthiest people to cancel their insurance. This leads to a further increase in premium price as the insurance companies now have a riskier group, which leads to the now healthiest people canceling their insurance, continuing the “adverse selection spiral”, until the only people insured are the direly ill. At this point, the premiums paid will not even begin to offset the costs of the sick. In theory, this could lead to the collapse of the health insurance industry, however, this is an unlikely scenario as their risk is diminished by things such as employer offered insurance, which includes a large set of healthy individuals who average out the risk.

Another information asymmetry example is the “Market for Lemons”, a term coined by the economist George Akerlof. The used car market is the classic example of quality uncertainty. A defective used car (“lemon”) is generally the result of untraceable actions, like the owners driving style, maintenance habits and accidents. Because the buyer does not have this information, their best assumption is that the vehicle is of average quality, and therefore will pay only an average fair price. As a result, the owner of a car in great condition (“cherry”), will not be able to get a price high enough to make selling the cherry worthwhile. End result: the owners of good cars will not sell their vehicles in the used-car market. This reduces the quality of cars in the used-car market, this reduces the price buyers will pay, this further reduces the quality of cars sold. You get the idea.

2

The Cobra Effect

This is when the solution to a problem actually makes the problem worse. The term ‘Cobra effect’ comes from an anecdote from colonial India. The British government wanted to decrease the population of venomous cobra snakes, so they offered a reward for every dead snake. However, the Indians began to breed cobras for the income. When the government realized what was going on, the reward was canceled, and the breeders set the snakes free. The snakes consequently multiplied, and increased the cobra population. The term is now used to illustrate the origins of wrong stimulation in politics and economic policy. Unfortunately, some of the crises facing our world are the result of honest attempts to solve problems.

1

The Samaritans Dilemma

This is the idea that giving charity reduces an individual’s incentive to help themselves. When given assistance, the recipient has two choices: use the aid to improve their situation, or come to rely on the aid to survive. Obviously, good Samaritans give assistance in the hopes of the former, that the recipient will use the aid to improve their situation. For example, when a country gives financial aid to another country who has experienced a natural disaster, we assume that the money will go to helping the victims, cleaning, rebuilding, etc. Arguers against charity often bring up this dilemma, claiming that beneficiaries of such aid lose incentive to work or become productive members of society. This can be seen in action when people who want to give a dollar or two to a homeless person do not, because they are afraid the person will buy booze with it. A “transfer of wealth” of a couple of dollars from someone who can spare the dollars to someone who will use the dollars to improve their situation is a wonderful arrangement. However, if the recipient of the dollars is not going to use the money for a noble purpose, and instead is going to buy illicit drugs with them, it is a less desirable arrangement, and most charitable people would decline to give the dollars. Here’s the problem: it is hard to know how the person you are giving the dollars to will use the funds, so people might instead opt to not give to any homeless people. Now the individuals who would have used the money to improve their situations suffer.

There are moments when other people just set you off, and you lose your patience.

It is the downfall of many of us — coworkers, children, spouses, other drivers, irritating people on the subway — they can grate, they can anger.

And it can ruin your day. You clench your jaw, you replay imaginary arguments in your head, or worse, you snap. And then you feel like crap.

How can we find the patience?

I will admit that I’m no saint. Just like everyone else, I get annoyed, and I will say things in a less-than-kind tone. I’m learning.

Here’s what helps me:

First, I learn to be aware of the emotions that rush up from nowhere.

I learn to accept those emotions as perfectly fine.

And I watch them, but don’t act.

I will talk to those emotions, like they’re a little child: it’s OK to be mad, but breathe. Talk to the other person, after you’ve calmed down, about the problem.

And then I breathe.

I remind my childlike emotions: other people are different, and that’s good. Celebrate humanity and all its glorious varieties. When people live and work together, there will be friction, and that is a part of the mix of humanity.

I remind: life is too short to waste my days in irritation and anger. Don’t let other people’s problems become my own.

I then give thanks. Gratitude solves all problems. I am grateful for having this friend, or stranger, in my life, and I’m grateful for the chance to even be here, and for the incredible life I have.

I talk to the other person, when I’ve calmed down, with compassion. I respond with love. It often will melt the other person’s jagged edges, and things will go better.

Patience isn’t an easy thing, but the alternative is much worse. Love will triumph if you let it.